Dear Jane,
I had a contract with someone for my services. Now this person has broken the terms of the contract and decided not to pursue the project. The decision has nothing to do with the quality of my work but is due to her personal circumstances. My preliminary work has taken countless hours and cost me money out of pocket. The contract is clear about what she owes me for the work done so far; however, she doesn’t want to pay because of “financial hardship.” I know I could take her to court. But what is your spiritual slant on this?
In my book, Enough Is Enough!, I talk about The Highest Good. The Highest Good means that you behave in self-loving ways and then trust that this is also best for others. No one can know what anyone else’s Highest Good is. But here are some questions to ask yourself:
1. Will you feel victimized by this person if you don’t pursue financial compensation?
2. Are you harboring resentment that is likely to fester?
3. Do you feel ashamed or embarrassed to ask for what you deserve?
4. Do you have a difficult time advocating for yourself generally?
If you answered “yes” to any of the above, then your fear of confrontation and/or rejection is getting in the way of going for the Highest Good. You may talk yourself out of pursuing compensation, but it will probably cause you to suffer spiritually. Our spirits don’t thrive on fear; they thrive on challenging ourselves to move through our fears and on behaving in ways that support our worthiness.
Letting people off the hook tends to reinforce a belief that they can abuse others at will. It foments distrust and betrayal in other relationships. Therefore, asking someone to be accountable may be the Highest Good for all. In addition, it can remind us of the value of keeping our word with others and with ourselves. So the question to ask in finding the Highest Good is, “What does it mean to keep my word to myself and to act in self-respectful ways in this situation?”
Jane Straus is an executive coach, keynote speaker, and the author of Enough Is Enough! Stop Enduring and Start Living Your Extraordinary Life. To learn more about Jane’s executive coaching, to sign up for her free weekly e-newsletter, to see her TV interviews and videos, and to read excerpts from Enough Is Enough!, visit StopEnduring.com. Contact Jane at Jane@janestraus.com.
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